How To Start A Polygamy Relationship

How To Start A Polygamy Relationship

Polygamy, or plural marriage, is practiced by an estimated 138,000 polygamous households in America today. While not yet mainstream, polygamy has seen a surge in popularity and acceptance over the last decade, leading many people that have not found happiness with monogamy to consider a polygamous relationship. So how do you start a polygamy relationship?

Know what you need from the relationship

This seems obvious, but it is so often overlooked even in monogamy. Take the time to realistically consider what you need in a relationship, polygamous or otherwise. This is not just a matter of what you find attractive in a partner, or how you want your life to be, but what you need emotionally and physically on a deeper level.

Don't just dive into polygamy dating and hope that it will all work out. It won't. First, you have to know what you need so that you know what you are looking for in partners.

If you are a man or couple that will be looking for a sister wife, you will need to consider what her role will be within your family. Will she be an equal partner? Will the sister wives have somewhat separate relationships with their husband or will they be a throuple? What about your new sister wife's relationship with your family or kids? And probably most importantly, you should consider if you need someone that is family focused or career driven.

If you are a single woman that wants to join a plural family and become a sister wife, you should consider how you see your place in the family you want to join. What kind of relationship do you want to have with your sister wives? What kind of intimacy do you need with your husband, and do you intend to be intimate with your sister wife? Would you prefer to be a triad and have a single relationship? Emotionally, what do you need from your husband and sister wife?

These are just some examples, but the point is that you need to be very clear about what you want and need before starting any kind of relationship, let alone one that can be as complex as polygamy.

Join A Polygamy Dating Site

a couple meeting a potential polygamous partner

Most polygamists have the greatest success with polygamy dating sites like where they know that everyone on the site is looking for a polygamous relationship. This avoids the awkwardness of trying to find partners on traditional dating sites like Tinder and then explaining that you want to have a polygamist relationship.

Being open with your friends and family about the fact that you are looking for a polygamous relationship can also help you find potential partners, as they may know people that are interested in polygamy as well or end up having a conversation with a friend that will want to meet you. This is particularly useful for social media, where having pro-polygamy posts and memes could start interesting conversations with new people.

Take it slow

Most women that have decided that they want to become a sister wife, and most couples that have decided to have a plural marriage, have come to that conclusion after months, or years, of consideration. Usually, by that point, they have developed a deep desire to have a polygamous relationship and want to live happily in a plural marriage for the rest of their life.

The problem with this is that it can cause people to rush into a new relationship because of their desire to love and be loved rather than because it makes sense and they have found the right partners. If you want polygamy dating to be successful, it is important that you take the time to get to know your potential partners.

If you are doing online polygamy dating, go slow and have lots of phone conversations and video chats. As you become closer to your potential partner or sister wife, you should begin to discuss meeting in person. It's important that they feel that you are enthusiastic and excited about meeting them, and you should feel their interest and enthusiasm as well.

After meeting in person, you should start to be introduced to each other's family and friends before moving in together. This is an important step in the process of getting to know your new sister wife or partner and it's also important for you to know that they are not hiding their relationship with you from those close to them. Seeing how they treat you with their friends around will give you a better idea of how they feel about you.

Of course, polygamy dating is different for everyone and there is no set timeline for how long it should take to get to know your partners before moving in together or getting married. However, it is important that you all feel confident and comfortable with each other before taking any big steps.

Be honest about your intentions

There is nothing worse than getting into a polygamy dating and then finding out that one of the partners was not honest about their intentions. This can lead to hurt feelings, resentment, and ultimately, the end of the relationship.

It is important to be honest about your intentions from the beginning. If you are looking for a sister wife, be clear about that with potential partners. If you are looking for a couple to join but still have apprehension about living a polygamous lifestyle openly, be clear about that as well. The more honest you are, the more likely it is that you will find partners that are open and honest about their own intentions.

Being honest about your intentions also means being honest about your feelings. If you are feeling jealous or left out, say so. If you are feeling happy and loved, you should tell them. The more open you are with your emotions, the more likely it is that your polygamy relationship will be successful.

Have realistic expectations of polygamy

It's important to remember that polygamy dating is not perfect and there will be challenges, just like in any relationship. You should have realistic expectations about what a polygamy relationship looks like.

One of the biggest challenges in polygamy dating and relationships is managing jealousy. It is important to remember that each person is unique and has their own needs and wants. Just because you are in a plural marriage does not mean that you will never feel jealous. Jealousy is a normal emotion and it is something that you will need to work on together as a team.

Another challenge in polygyny dating is dealing with outsiders. Not everyone will understand or accept your polygamous lifestyle and you may find yourself having to defend it to family, friends, or even strangers. It's important to remember that you are not obligated to explain your relationship to anyone, but if you do choose to, be prepared for some difficult conversations.


Polygamy dating is not for everyone, but if it is something that you are interested in, there are ways to make it work. It's important to be honest about your intentions, have realistic expectations, and communicate openly with your partners. If you can do these things, you will be well on your way to having a successful and happy plural marriage.

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